Oh, what a Wednesday
I usually steer clear of diary blog posts, but I have to share my day with you.
I have been fascinated for some time with a church out of Kansas called the Westboro Baptist Church. They travel around to high profile American events and protest under the mantra of “God Hates Fags.” They believe that God is punishing America for our sodomy and that’s why great tragedies occur. Iraq veteran funerals, Virginia Tech funerals, Amish school shooting funerals… they protest at all of them. The fact that there is a group of people that has dedicated their lives to this cause amazes me. And with the pope in town, the Westboro Baptist Church decided to come and let ol’ Benny know what they thought.
And I knew I had to witness it.
I met up with a friend around 11:45am to head over for their noon protest in front of the White House. He shares my obsession with their disgusting opinions and wanted to come to see the show. We walked closer and realized that this wasn’t going to be as easy as we originally thought. Thousands of people lined Pennsylvania Avenue, each person holding Pope memorabilia, a fanny pack and digital camera. Roads were blocked, sidewalks were packed, and there were no Westboro members in sight.
We looked on in panic. How are we ever going to see the Westboro Baptist Church now? This is a once in a lifetime experience and we’re going to miss it.
And then I heard it. A roar came over the crowd that was louder than Bon Jovi fans in Giants Stadium. There was cheering, and clapping and drum circles and everyone starting jumping. And before I knew it, Pope Benedict sped by me in all his gremlin-glory. (The pope mobile is actually a really expensive Mercedes. He rides DUBs.) He looked just as ugly in person and was gone before I knew it. A good portion of the crowd laughed and turned to their friends after they saw him. That wasn’t something I expected out of my Catholic brethren.
The crowd finally dispersed and we continued on our journey to see the WBC. We walked around the back of the White House hoping we’d see their trademark signs there, but to no avail. Things were looking bad. Maybe we missed them in the melee. Maybe I’d never get to see the Westboro Baptist Church.
And then I saw the light. The great big shining light of homophobia. We rounded the corner into Lafayette Park and there they were. I felt giddy. It felt like I was meeting Vern Troyer or Brian Peppers.
There were only a few of them, and no one in the park seemed to really care. They had some really confusing signs including “Pedophile Rape Pimp,” “Fag Pimp Pope,” and the crowd favorite, “You Eat Your Kids.”
We stood watching for a bit when we noticed a disturbance across from us. A small counter-protest had popped up. It consisted of two skinny blond girls in jean mini-skirts who were yelling at the WBC. They had signs that defended the Catholic Church and kept yelling about how God is Love. And then it shifted. They started yelling “We love eating vagina!” and “I am so happy to love girls.” This was a little unexpected, but at least it kind of made sense.
The next part did not make much sense.
The more vocal member of the counter protest began to yell even louder. Suddenly, she screamed “HEY WESTBORO BAPTIST,” which startled most people in the area. And with out even a second thought, she did it.
She lifted up her shirt and flashed the Westboro Baptist Church. And me. Her breasts were followed with, “You saw my boobs! You’re all going to hell!”
That’s when I laughed.
Our counter protesting friend defended the Pope and the Catholic Church through a public display of nudity.
I thought about that and laughed again.
Moments later a college age photographer came over and laughed with us about what had happened. He told us the girl was 16.
That’s when we felt uncomfortable.
And eventually the crowd around the protest grew larger, and the WBC panicked and packed up. They received a police escort out of the park and we returned to campus.
What had started as a walk to see some crazy bigots turned into a journey. With in one hour of each other I saw the following: Crazy people, The Pope and a 16 year old’s breasts.
Oh, what a Wednesday it has been.
MAJOR EDIT: Pat, my partner on my Wednesday journey, just found a picture of the girls on a BBC website. The one on the left was the phantom flasher. Here’s the link.
April 16, 2008 at 2:05 pm
I was in class during the Pope’s drive-by, but I’m sorry I missed this. I also followed the saga of the WBC (do you know if they ever made it to Australia to protest Heath Ledger?), and seeing them in person would have been … well, interesting, anyway. One other point, to the flag-clad WBC-er: doesn’t that violate the Flag Code?
April 16, 2008 at 2:21 pm
Their rendition of the Blood Hound Gang’s “The Roof is on Fire” was especially fun.
A sample lyric:
The Pope, The Pope, The Pope is on fire/
The Pope, The Pope, The Pope is on fire/
He don’t get no water
let the *unintelligble” burn/
Burn false prophet, burn
April 16, 2008 at 2:31 pm
“With in one hour of each other I saw the following: Crazy people, The Pope and a 16 year old’s breasts. Oh, what a Wednesday it has been.”
I don’t know where you guys’ve been hanging out, but minus His Holiness, you’ve pretty much described every Wednesday here on campus. BORING.
April 16, 2008 at 5:23 pm
In the future, I’d like to see a little more coverage of the local Jewish community if at all possible.
April 16, 2008 at 7:16 pm
When you say you don’t like their opinions, you really mean you don’t like their religious beliefs. Since they base their opinions off of their reading of the Bible. How is that different from saying that you don’t like the religious beliefs of Muslims?
April 16, 2008 at 7:24 pm
I disagree with their particular reading of the bible, not the bible itself. It’s akin to disagreeing with Bin Laden’s reading of the Koran, not the Koran itself or the vast majority of other Muslims who don’t adhere to a fundamentalist reading of the text. Your comment’s logic makes no sense.
April 16, 2008 at 7:39 pm
Kyle,
Their reading — like all interpretations of literature — is subjective.
What one understands certain words and phrases linking up to form a meaning has no bearing on what another sees (unless of course the second, potentially affected person is aware of the first’s reading: in that case, the first interpretation would bear on the second, but not in a necessarily complimentary — or necessarily antagonistic — way).
The Bible can be — and is…all the time — interpreted in divers ways. The Westboro-ers have one interpretation of a text.
That being said, saying someone doesn’t like the opinions of a specific religious subgroup isn’t saying one doesn’t like the religion in toto. Even more, it’s definitely not saying one doesn’t like the text that informs said religion.
This is complicated even more by the fact that your example (Islam->The Koran) is a text that is only read religiously in its original language. The act of translation does a lot to what something means & the Westboro-ers are reading a version that is in at least its fourth declension from the original.
There are a whole shitload of other reasons why your comparison doesn’t hold any water — not the least of which being the absurdity of your base assumption (that saying “I don’t like so-and-so’s religious beliefs” is something absolutely abhorrent.)
April 17, 2008 at 12:28 am
Travis, I have always thought the pope looked like a gremlin too! No one else ever really agreed with me though.
Glad to know someone else thinks so.
April 17, 2008 at 1:28 am
i was sort of shocked by all the pope t-shirts that were out and about around campus. i thought there was a whole anti-idolatry thing in the catholic church but apparently not. my absolute favorite looked like a standard issue high school gym shirt and read:
Property of Benedict
XVI
Upon This Rock….
needless to say the idea of being the “property” of the pope really freaks me out.
April 17, 2008 at 2:50 pm
That sixteen year old is pretty hot. Kudos.
April 17, 2008 at 3:16 pm
I just want to mention that I “intern” (I use this term loosely) across from the National Basilica and there are *still* Pope fans marching (on the sidewalks; the streets are no longer blocked off) and singing hymns (with tambourine accompaniment!). It’s fantastic background noise to reading old Colonialist posts and avoiding doing actual work.
I should be fired, but can you really fire interns? Really?
April 18, 2008 at 1:29 pm
Holy Shit, I know that girl. Well I’m pretty sure I know her. She went to my school, or her brother did and she went to St Johns (a catholic school in the area). I swear I know her, I think she Cheerleads. Yeah She Cheerleads.
April 22, 2008 at 3:04 pm
[...] our “Oh, What A Wednesday” post about the Westboro Baptist Church has gotten the attention of a certain group of [...]